Sunday, July 27, 2014

The one on his 5th Birthday

We're fresh off a weekend of celebrating our parent's 40th Wedding Anniversary in Atlanta & boy did we have a great time revisiting places, memories, & pictures that make a 40 year legacy of love & commitment! 

Turner Field

And then today: today marks our 7 year engagement anniversary.  7 Years ago my sweet, mischievous, sexy boyfriend asked me to be his wife in the most perfect way [for us].  Now here we are, in the midst of an incredible journey together

It was a great weekend but as I lay down tonight my heart is quite heavy. 

Somewhere, on the other side of the world, there is a little boy turning 5 today.  His day has already begun & so I wonder: has someone wished him a 'happy birthday'?  Is anyone going to celebrate his precious life today?  Will there be balloons, cake, & presents?  Will he feel special or celebrated?

On a day set designated for celebration I am left wondering if he knows: does he have any idea how much he is wanted?  How much he is loved?  Does he have any idea that he is loved by the Creator of the universe?  Does he know that he is fearfully and wonderfully made?  Does he know he has been created to leave a legacy in this world that is bigger than himself?  Does he know he is he is cherished & treasured by a family halfway around the world?  Does he know how deeply we long to hold him in our arms?  Oh Lord, does he know that he is loved? 

These are the musings of a waiting Mama....

And I wonder too, where was I on the day he was born?  What was I doing?  How was God working in my life to prepare me to be his Mama?  Where are his belly Mommy & Daddy now?  Are they thinking of him today & wondering how he is doing?  Are they celebrating today that they made the right choice in giving their son a different chance at life or are they grieving the unthinkable loss of not being about to care for him?

The honest answer to all of these questions is that I don't know & it is likely that I never will. There are so many more questions I will probably never have the answers to; & it is not for my own benefit alone that I wish we could know.  It breaks my heart to know he will have questions one day, so many questions, that we will never be able to answer this side of Heaven. 

So on this, the day of your birth, we will choose to celebrate what we do know: you are loved sweet child!  You are loved by this Mama & Daddy--& our wonderfully crazy family--& we cannot wait until we get to meet you, get to hold you, & get to celebrate you for the precious, valued life that you are!  More importantly, you are loved by the one & only Almighty God, the Creator of the Universe!  He knit you together in your belly Mommy's womb & He knows your inmost thoughts.  He has been with you every step of the way.  He has never left your side & He has incredible things in store for your life! 

The Voice (VOICE)
Psalm 139
For the worship leader. A song of David.
O Eternal One, You have explored my heart and know exactly who I am;
You even know the small details like when I take a seat and when I stand up again.
    Even when I am far away, You know what I’m thinking.
You observe my wanderings and my sleeping, my waking and my dreaming,
    and You know everything I do in more detail than even I know.
You know what I’m going to say long before I say it.
    It is true, Eternal One, that You know everything and everyone.
You have surrounded me on every side, behind me and before me,
    and You have placed Your hand gently on my shoulder.
It is the most amazing feeling to know how deeply You know me, inside and out;
    the realization of it is so great that I cannot comprehend it.
Can I go anywhere apart from Your Spirit?
    Is there anywhere I can go to escape Your watchful presence?
If I go up into heaven, You are there.
    If I make my bed in the realm of the dead, You are there.
If I ride on the wings of morning,
    if I make my home in the most isolated part of the ocean,
10 Even then You will be there to guide me;
    Your right hand will embrace me, for You are always there.
11 Even if I am afraid and think to myself, “There is no doubt that the darkness will swallow me,
    the light around me will soon be turned to night,”
12 You can see in the dark, for it is not dark to Your eyes.
    For You the night is just as bright as the day.
    Darkness and light are the same to Your eyes.
13 For You shaped me, inside and out.
    You knitted me together in my mother’s womb long before I took my first breath.
14 I will offer You my grateful heart, for I am Your unique creation, filled with wonder and awe.
    You have approached even the smallest details with excellence;
    Your works are wonderful;
I carry this knowledge deep within my soul.
15     You see all things; nothing about me was hidden from You
As I took shape in secret,
    carefully crafted in the heart of the earth before I was born from its womb.
16 You see all things;
    You saw me growing, changing in my mother’s womb;
Every detail of my life was already written in Your book;
    You established the length of my life before I ever tasted the sweetness of it.
17 Your thoughts and plans are treasures to me, O God! I cherish each and every one of them!
    How grand in scope! How many in number!
18 If I could count each one of them, they would be more than all the grains of sand on earth. Their number is inconceivable!
    Even when I wake up, I am still near to You.

We celebrate you today, sweet one, & cannot wait to hold you in our arms!  Happy Birthday dear child~  Love, your Mama & Daddy

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